He saw her
standing there in her yellow silk sari and his eyes flooded with tears.
He quickly blinked, trying to rid himself of the weakness. He had
to stay strong. This was always part of the plan. It was his curse
and there was no ridding himself of the devil on his back until the
episode was complete. He must deny her; it was time.
Sati noticed
Rama and she began running toward him.
How could he follow through? Her
hair flew behind her in the wind, her sari pressed flat against her beautiful
body as she ran to him. His wife, his
beautiful wife…she retained her beauty through her captive stay. She flung
herself in his arms and he stood still, pressing his hands to his thighs to
make sure his body would not contradict his resolution. He stood firm. Sati cried and held on sinking to his feet
beyond elated to see her hero; her husband.
Rama looked ahead stoned face, blinking back weakness and recalling his
decision years ago.
Rama was six
years old playing in the Gardens with Lakshmana. They were running around and hiding behind or
within anything they could find. It was
an exceptionally hot day and Rama remembers running over to the pond hoping to
cup some fresh water in his hands before Lakshmana found him. As he bent over to dip his fingers in the
cool blue water, he noticed a figure standing behind him in the reflection of
the pond. Rama, startled, spun around
and nearly fell into the fresh water behind him, but then shortly relaxed
afterward as he saw it was just a kind older woman.
“Hello, child. May I share the pond with you? It is very hot and I cannot imagine walking
farther,” the woman walks closer. Rama
was not scared, but merely curious, so he stumbled to the side and took water
for himself beside her. As they drank
the woman turned and said, “I see great things in your future child. Your eyes show power and strength, great
strength. You will do miraculous things
one day, things the gods themselves cannot do.”
Rama’s eyes
grew big. What did she mean? How does she see my future? He slowly sputtered out, “What will I do?”
The woman
smiled, “You are a special child; a chosen one.
You have been chosen to act on behalf of the gods and rid the world of
evil. Soon you will receive your mission
but just know, you have great things ahead of you. But there will be death and fire, you will
lose…”
“Lose? Why would I be called by the gods only to
lose?” Rama now felt this woman was
crazy, and began to turn and leave when she quietly said, “Look within
yourself, you are a smart child. Why
would the god’s want you to survive if you help them do something they cannot
do themselves? You would then be a
threat to them and they could not let you live.” Rama stopped.
In his heart, he knew she was telling the truth. He felt a pull deep within to believe her and
listen to her. He turned, “And how shall I win?
Am I destined for greatness only to lose my life?”
The woman
smiled, “Dear child, I said you would lose, but that does not have to mean
losing your life. There is another option.”
Rama leaned
in, “Yes! What is the other option?”
“You must
lose your first love in order to win the gods’ favor and save your life. The fire god, Agni, survives by people’s
sacrifice. If your first love does not
give herself to Agni, Agni will come for you. If you try to get in the way, not only will
your first love die, but what you accomplished will fall apart and you must
fight the evil for the rest of your life, never fulfilling your destiny.”
Rama
laughed, “Well of course I will give Agni my first love! I will do as you say
if you promise I will defeat evil and save my life.” Rama thought to himself,
foolish woman, I do not know any girls but my sister, how will I ever find time
for love with such a calling from the gods?
“Of course
dear boy. From now on, your decision is
binding and you will be victorious.”
Then the woman’s sweet smile turned and twisted. Rama’s peace turned to fear as the woman
burst into flames and disappeared.
Agni. Rama just made a deal with
the god of fire herself.
***
To Be Continued...
Author's Note:
I was moved by the final story of Rama denying Sita. I wanted to give a voice to Rama because when I read the story I felt angry towards him. How could he deny this woman just because she was captured. It was not her choice. There must be a reason behind his coldness. So I decided to give him a reason and change up the story a bit. I realized it would turn into a longer story so I decided to only do half and give insight to Rama's "deal with the devil" (or more like "deal with the fire god") today and then return to the ending of the episode on another day.
Bibliography:
Narayan's Ramayana, Reading Guide D.
